ENTERTAINMENT
How To: Look Busy
It’s more important than ever to look busy. We all know that. That’s why the Surry Hills Times' resident expert on cool is here...
LIFESTYLE NEWS
Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies
...while chanting "Men's Rights are Human Rights". Seems about right.
STAY IN TOUCH
Brothers Steven and Martin Tyler Reunite to Call England Match
The upcoming blockbuster World Cup semi-final between England and Croatia will see two brothers reunited for the first time in decades.
Brothers Martin Tyler and...
NEWS IN REVIEW
LATEST
First Time Punter Takes Forever at Pub TAB. Police Intervene.
A once-a-year Melbourne Cup punter caused a riot in a Sydney pub today. “It’s all so confusing! What the hell is a...
ENTERTAINMENT
Baldness Now Officially a Disability
An upside to the Will Smith debacle is that a new disability has been discovered! Alopecia, also known as 'spot baldness' is...
Outrage: In ‘Retirement’ Winx is Set to Become Sexworker in Surry Hills Brothel
The champion mare Winx captured the heart of the nation in her stunning career, but now shocking plans have been revealed for...
Babies for Hire as Women Declare it’s Over for Alpha Males
Research confirms contemporary women are no longer attracted to the typical Alpha Male, rather sensitive single fathers. With that “Babies For Hire” was born.
So what...
All of Surry Hills Outraged at Mega Wanky Paddo Obsessed Tosser Couple on ‘Love...
The entire suburb is fuming, absolutely feee-uming, after the latest episode of LIOLI featured two finance horrors who considered our wonderful suburb...
Channel 7 Trials New Watermark
The TV screens of Surry Hills have featured a new watermark trialled by Channel 7 as part of their promotion for the 2019 series...
SOCIETY
Wealthy Hedge Fund Manager Crashes Local Charity Dinner
I am of course joking. The evening went off without a hitch.
The Surry Hills Times would like to shed its suit of satire and...
