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ENTERTAINMENT
Google Confirms it will play Baker Boy ad Every Single Ad...
That's every single ad break... until the end of time.
LIFESTYLE NEWS
Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies
...while chanting "Men's Rights are Human Rights". Seems about right.
STAY IN TOUCH
First Time Punter Takes Forever at Pub TAB. Police Intervene.
A once-a-year Melbourne Cup punter caused a riot in a Sydney pub today. “It’s all so confusing! What the hell is a...
NEWS IN REVIEW
LATEST
Council Plans to Barricade Sydney Harbour Bridge on New Year’s Eve...
Exclusive: The Surry Hills Times can reveal Sydney City Council is pushing forward with plans to make New Years Eve 2019/20 the...
ENTERTAINMENT
Polo Announces Permanently Popped Collar
In a move that will excite private school old-boys, fashion giant Polo has announced a brilliant new feature driven by consumer demand: a permanently...
Local Wanker Overheard Delighting at Rain Because “My Vertical Garden Needs It”
The conversation continued as follows:
“The farmers probably need it more,” one cafe patron replied.
“What...
Call For an End to Animated Greyhounds on National Dog Day
A small but vocal crowd gathered in Surry Hills outside the Shakespeare Hotel on Devonshire Street yesterday to protest the running of animated greyhounds...
Local Man Buys Three Vacuums in Black Friday Sale. Regrets Nothing.
“I bought two last year and I just couldn't bloody help meself this year either,” said Max Merch.
The...
Manly Boardroom Meeting
Manly has descended into further chaos after it's been revealed that a boardroom meeting went completely pear-shaped. Senior management executives at Manly instigated the...
SOCIETY
“I’m Buying A Jigsaw” Easter Weekend Defence a Beauty
If you've pissed off for the weekend you're very, very naughty. But if the cops do pull you over the SHT has...
