Surry Hills Times | News

Entertainment

Biological Woman Dies Aged 89

Surry Hills Times - 23/04/2023

How To

Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies

Entertainment

Google Confirms it will play Baker Boy ad Every Single Ad Break Until the End of Time.

NRL

Stuart Finally Agrees to Anger Management Course

ENTERTAINMENT

Gossip

Sad Hetero Couple’s Token Mardi Gras Celebration

Surry Hills Times - 03/03/2019

Four measly cans of novelty Mardi Gras cider was all this pissweak couple could manage on a night when many of Surry...

Proof Kiwis Think We’re Idiots

16/10/2020

Legend Resident Can’t be Fucked Walking Up the Road for Booze

16/08/2019

Non-Tinder Date in Surry Hills

11/03/2019

How Busy are the Women of Australia?

30/07/2018

LIFESTYLE NEWS

How To

Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies

Surry Hills Times - 08/03/2023

...while chanting "Men's Rights are Human Rights". Seems about right.

Health & Fitness

Pfizer Announce No Need For Any More Booster Shots

Surry Hills Times - 01/04/2022

April Fools.

Baldness Now Officially a Disability

29/03/2022

Mass Celebrations as Surry Hills Times Survives Facebook Ban

18/02/2021

‘White King’ Cancelled

06/08/2020

Bunnings Issue Compulsory Safety Protection Against Karens

28/07/2020

STAY IN TOUCH

Business

Daylight Savings: One Extra Hour To Complete To-Do List

Business

Surry Hills Man to Auction off his Virginity

Business

Is Uber Deliberately Recording Passengers?

SPORT

Breaking

Manly Boardroom Meeting

Surry Hills Times - 16/08/2018

Manly has descended into further chaos after it's been revealed that a boardroom meeting went completely pear-shaped. Senior management executives at Manly instigated the...

Sledge Prompts Warner to Quit Cricket to work in Bunnings’ Sandpaper...

28/10/2018

World’s First Honest Betting Agency Opens in Time for the Cup

05/11/2018

NRL Supercoach Draft Stress is Killing Men, But Not Fast Enough...

25/05/2020

Jubilant Scenes as NRL Footy Show Finally Axed

02/10/2018

NEWS IN REVIEW

Animal Life

Local Dog Eats Magic Mushrooms in Park and Trips Balls

Gossip

All of Surry Hills Outraged at Mega Wanky Paddo Obsessed Tosser...

Gossip

Local Digital Newspaper Editor Descends Into Alcoholism After Instagram Stops Likes

Local

Road Delays Continue on Bourke Street

LATEST

Dating

Dishwasher Porn Sweeping the Nation

Surry Hills Times - 31/07/2018

A new craze has women in giddy raptures: Dishwasher Porn - the act of women watching men unstacking dishwashers. It’s become so popular that that...

Women Desperately Looking For ‘The Spark’ Date Electricians

29/05/2018

Council Install Faulty Bin

16/07/2019

ENTERTAINMENT

Job-Posting First World Problems Now a Thing

Surry Hills Times - 19/05/2018

The phrase 'First World Problems' gets bandied around, and it must be asked: are we in the East a horribly spoilt and overly privileged...

Local Hero Watches Love Actually with Girlfriend. Doesn’t Complain.

Surry Hills Times - 23/12/2018

Surry Hills man Michael Beattie, 27, was in emotional disarray after being forced to watch the perennial Christmas classic ‘Love Actually’ by...

All of Surry Hills Outraged at Mega Wanky Paddo Obsessed Tosser Couple on ‘Love...

Surry Hills Times - 10/10/2019

The entire suburb is fuming, absolutely feee-uming, after the latest episode of LIOLI featured two finance horrors who considered our wonderful suburb...

How Busy are the Women of Australia?

Surry Hills Times - 30/07/2018

Advertising Garnier’s new 4 in 1 cream 'BB' (Beautifully Busy) allows the busy women of Australia to get on with their day faster thanks to...

Proof Kiwis Think We’re Idiots

Surry Hills Times - 16/10/2020

Advertising If you’re Australian and you’ve seen the latest commercial for Air New Zealand you’ll smell a rat. Or specifically a goose. You may...

SOCIETY

Local Man King Hit After Asking Colleague How Bad Her Hail...

Surry Hills Times - 21/12/2018

Gossip

The hail storm that raged through Sydney last night has claimed another victim. Matt Canavan foolishly asked his colleague...

DATING

How To: Look Busy

Surry Hills Times - 26/04/2018

Toxic Feminism: Woman’s Cinema Armrest Hogging Goes Too Far

12/02/2019

Surry Hills Resident Sues Tinder for RSI of the Thumb

28/06/2018

World First: Local Unicorn Genuinely Doesn’t Give a Shit About Valentine’s Day

14/02/2021

HOW TO

Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies

Surry Hills Times - 08/03/2023

How To: Look Busy

26/04/2018

Women Banned from Putting On Makeup On Buses

05/04/2019

Man Plays Hide & Seek With Kids. Hides in Cupboard for 48 Hours.

26/04/2020

BUSINESS

Survey Reveals Mass Fail for 80% of Surry Hills Residents’ New Year’s Resolutions

Surry Hills Times - 20/01/2020

Local Pub to be First Ever Dedicated ‘NRL Nude Pub’

Surry Hills Times - 12/09/2018

Dalai Lama Espouses Teachings of 17-year-old Girl

Surry Hills Times - 23/04/2018

Sport

TV Ratings Revealed. Origin: 3.5M, World Cup: 500K, Love Island: 100K, Cricket: 1.

Surry Hills Times - 25/06/2018

Local

Local Activist Creates “Four For the Shore”. Founder of “Three for the Sea” Outraged.

Surry Hills Times - 06/02/2019

Breaking

Sydney’s Afternoonlife Pronounced Dead at 3pm Today

Surry Hills Times - 24/02/2019

LATEST ARTICLES

Entertainment

Biological Woman Dies Aged 89

Surry Hills Times - 23/04/2023

How To

Man Celebrates International Women’s Day by Legally Entering the Ladies

Surry Hills Times - 08/03/2023

Entertainment

Google Confirms it will play Baker Boy ad Every Single Ad...

Surry Hills Times - 09/08/2022

NRL

Stuart Finally Agrees to Anger Management Course

Surry Hills Times - 08/08/2022

Sport

Stand Collapses at Joey’s v Riverview Match. Luckily 1,424 Doctors in...

Surry Hills Times - 07/08/2022

Local

Blaspheming Pilot Enrages Local Christians

Surry Hills Times - 05/04/2022

Local

Locals Confused by Big Yellow Firey Ball in Sky

Surry Hills Times - 04/04/2022

Health & Fitness

Pfizer Announce No Need For Any More Booster Shots

Surry Hills Times - 01/04/2022

Politics

Zelensky Requests ‘Smith Slap’ to Divert Attention Back to Ukraine

Surry Hills Times - 31/03/2022

Local

Baldness Now Officially a Disability

Surry Hills Times - 29/03/2022

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