In a move that will excite private school old-boys, fashion giant Polo has announced a brilliant new feature driven by consumer demand: a permanently popped collar.
They’re designed with nine space-age titanium struts that run through the collar, literally seamlessly woven through the fabric.
Fashion guru Yohji was the genius behind the revolutionary new design. “Collar designed for any situation. Even gale force winds on harbour cruise. Or Mercedes AMG convertible travelling on Autobarn.”
“Our clientele is just too busy and important to pop their own collar, and a non or half popped collar can be disastrous,” said the head of Polo marketing Rodrick Jansen.
An old boy from Kings who doesn’t wish to be named recounts a moment of humiliation that he’s left him emotionally scarred.
“I went to the Ashes at the SCG. I was in the Members Bar all day. I thought my collar was safely, squarely and proudly popped. It was only when I got home that I realised it was only half popped.”
He checked Instagram and to his horror, the collar had been half popped all day.
“I was suicidal for weeks.”
The collar now comes in a range of sizes: gold and platinum.
