The NRL is an intense game. An eighty minute thrill ride. Post match interviews with the heroes that play the game, however, are not.
On the pitch these supremely physically fit men at the peak of their powers who test strength and skill in a combative cauldron like no other turn into blabbering, nonsensical, nincompoops who give nothing away. Because that’s just what they were taught to do.
When confronted by the barrel of a camera the Media Advisors appointed by the NRL have taught its players to give nothing away. Under all circumstances.
Unfortunately for its fans that also translates to post match interviews and press conferences that go something like this:
(Actual transcript) “Yeah, nah, look, obviously the boys are happy with the result. We worked hard at training all week and we’re just happy to come away with the two points. Everyone’s bought in this season, we’ve got our processes in place and it’s good to come away with the win. But it’s a long season and now we’re concentrating on next week. That it? Cheers.”
This kind of magical non-talk where the interviewee gives nothing away is the stuff of dreams for controversial industries beset by scandal and pursued by aggressive lines of questioning from journalists baying for blood.
As Darius Boyd famously proved, Rugby League players are a vault:
The Surry Hills Times can reveal the Media Advisors who work with the NRL have been working directly with Cardinal George Pell who after fronting the Supreme Court was confronted by a pack of journalists.
Cardinal Pell confidently brushed aside his barrister and tackled the media head on.
This is part of the actual transcript from the questions Pell faced:
Journalists: Cardinal Pell, did you admit to any wrong-doing?
Pell: Yeah, nah, look, obviously it was tough in there, and it was all about defence. Luckily I’ve got a great bunch of blokes around me who held up their end. It’s about committing to the process and buying in…
Journalist: What about allegations against Archbishop Wilson?
Pell: “Yeah, nah, look, I don’t know if that’s Willo’s go, obviously that’s not up to me, I’m just concentrating on my own form…”
Journalist: “Have you been truthful?”
Pell: “Yeah, nah, look, obviously week-in-week-out you go out there and do your best. You focus on your job and you get it done. It’s all about preparation and you know, put in the hard yards all week, coming up with a plan, sticking to it and not being afraid to get into the grind…”
Journalist “Cardinal Pell, some serious charges have been laid against Archbishop Wilson.”
Pell: “He’s been charged? Yeah nah look I don’t know the full story there, look I don’t want to comment on that… obviously the judiciary will take care of that.”
Journalist: “But the allegations against Archbishop Wilson are very serious. You used to train together as what can you say about him…”
Pell: “Yeah look, I don’t know if that’s his go…”
Journalist: “Have you spoken to him do you know how he’s going to plead?”
Pell: “No. And obviously I don’t know how he’s pleading but, obviously it’s a matter for the tribunal. I’m just going to concentrate on my recovery.”
The interview went on like this for two hours. Eventually a stunned media pack dropped off one by one until there were none left.
Pell stood on his own before wandering off down Pitt Street.
