The modern obsession with a Kardashian-esque big booty has led to mass confusion amongst men to the age-old question “Does my bum look big in this?”

Yes? No? It’s a confusing time for men.

It’s a problem that has resulted in injury to local man Mark Glanville, 28, who innocently answered his girlfriend Jess “No” when she asked the question.

“I thought I did the right thing”, said Mark, “Next thing you know I got a high heel in the temple that required 8 stitches… but I’ve learnt and I’ll be a better boyfriend next time.”

For decades men have instinctively answered the question “Does my bum look big in this?” with a swift and decisive “No”, but now in a sign of the times it’s not a simple as that.

Back in the 90s when ‘Sir Mix-A-Lot’ penned the timeless classic “I like big butts” he could not have imagined the mass confusion he was ushering in. Decades later now Kim Kardashian and a big butt fixation has meant big booties are all the rage.

This has changed everything

So how to manage “Does my bum look big in this? the answer is a simple, timeless and instinctive act of survival that has kept men alive for thousands of years: run.