Technology

Smart Phones are so engaging that they’re turning us into a nation of ‘Phone Zombies’.

And that’s why Smart Phones are about to be usurped – by its most unlikely of rivals: the Dumb Phone.

And those leading the way? Not surprisingly post millennials, also known as ‘Generation Z’.

“No longer will we walk into traffic, off train platforms and into Ubers – or innocently double parked cars,” said Sarah Cole 23 of Surry Hills.

These enormous chunks of plastic, metal and a mess of copper wire weigh a tonne, and they’re now the go-to piece of must-have technology for 20-somethings.

Cool.

The surge in popularity of previously scrapheaped analogue has come off the back of fears that Smartphones may very well just be a whole lot smarter than us.

The late great Stephen ‘Stevo’ ‘The Hawk’ Hawking himself had grave concerns for humanity. He believed that technology would trump humanity threatening the very species.

It now seems that Generation Z has taken the cause of our species to heart and are doing their best to ensure our collective survival.

Some psychologists suggest the phenomenon is motivated by ego. “Many feel the Smartphone is trying to upstage them in social settings where the device is seen as a wanker and up itself,” said Associate Professor at Macquarie University Graeme Wynne.

Any phone’s ability to dominate trivia night, predict the weather, calculate who owes what at breakfast and upload to Insta is seen as obnoxious.

But Generation Z disagrees.

“Dumb Phones are about taking control. Taking back charge of one’s life and not allowing technology to get control of our lives,” said Sarah. “Having a Dumb Phone is about taking a stand. It’s a victory for humans.”

Long live the Dumb Phone. Long live humanity.

Smart move guy.