Bill Shorten is the latest politician to fall victim to a blatant stunt to popularise himself with the people by pulling his knob out at a charity function for a church group in Sydney today.
Religious constituents in conservative Woollahra in the heart of Sydney’s East were shocked this afternoon to see Bill Shorten blatantly pull out his member.
Part of the congregation, Penny Newton said, “He’s actually got a decent old fella on him. He should have pulled it out earlier. I might have voted for him.”
Malcolm Turnbull attended the event and seemed non-plussed. “To be honest I’ve seen Bill’s schlong before. He’s pulled it out a few times. It’s just who he is.”
However the Pastor was not impressed. Father Kerr, a Catholic priest for over 50 years said “Of course politicians need to pull a stunt to prove they’re men of the people and it was only a matter of time before one pulled his knob out, but doing so during a mass is completely uncalled for. Having said that it was a decent dick and balls.”
Naturally this comes off the back of PM Scott Morrison desperately trying to ingratiate himself with the Australian people by sculling a beer at the Prime Minister’s XI cricket yesterday.
If he had sculled the Prime Minister’s XI we may have been impressed.