It seems Australian sport is intent on a strict “No Dickheads” policy.
Which begs the question: what exactly is a Dickhead?
Is it being a larrikin?
If so, we’re shunning a much-loved character that is part of the national identity.
The more pertinent question is: what’s wrong with being a Dickhead?
Dickheads are important. Especially on the footy field.
They’re individuals. They’re supremely confident. They have flare. They see the world differently.
But most importantly, they take risks.
When you need a player to make a break in a clutch moment you look to your biggest Dickhead.
And that’s why in the year 2000, the NSW Blues trounced the Maroons 3-0, with the last game being a 56-16 thumping.
The 2000 NSW Blues State of Origin team constituted perhaps the biggest collection of Dickheads in modern Rugby League history.
Of the 21 NSW players who made up that series it can conservatively be estimated that 14 were Dickheads, six of which were All-Time Dickheads including: Andrew Johns, Bryan Fletcher, Terry Hill, Adam MacDougall, Jason Stevens and Brad Fittler.
New South Wales’ dominance from 2003-2005 can also be attributed to a firm Dickhead Policy.
The mouth-watering assemblage of unabashed dickheads in the state of New South Wales who happened to be playing Rugby League at an elite level between 2003-05 defies belief:
Shall we?
Willie Mason, Brett Finch, Anthony Watmough, Jason Ryles, Mark Gasnier, Timana Tahu, Craig Gower, Mark O’Meley, Trent Waterhouse, Anthony Minichiello, Ryan Girdler, Trent Barrett, Nathan Hindmarsh, Craig Wing.
Dickheads all.
Victorious ones.