The PM was quick to point out that handjobs were not the exclusive domain of men, but universal amongst staff.
Malcom Turnbull has been sensationally ousted. But it can now be revealed that in his death thoes, and with his last governance, he has permitted handjobs in Canberra.
In recent months ex-Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull banned sex between ministers and their staff, however he has now has confirmed that handjobs were permitted.
The ban was in response to a scandal which engulfed the deputy prime minister and leader of the National party, Barnaby Joyce.
Turnbull announced the ban at the end of a parliamentary week dominated by controversy over Joyce’s relationship with a former staffer, Vikki Campion, which effectively ended Joyce’s 24-year marriage.
However he has rethought his position since.
“We work in a pressure charged environment, a release of that pressure is important,” said Prime Minister Turnbull. “As such, wristies are still on the table.”
The official position of the government is that the sanctity of the family unit and the institution of marriage is of paramount importance for the government and for society. As such, banning sex between staff is essential for the continuing functioning of the government.
But allowing handjobs is equally crucial.